Well....I did something really stupid tonite. Ruined my whole evening...and the other guy's...
Well..theres this guy I had met a couple weeks ago at a (lets just say adult venue) We got along really well....the chemistry was there......
We had alot of fun.....
We met again the next week and he took me to a big work party that was thrown (he works at hotel Nikko) it was fancy.....kinda boring tho but ok. That nite his car broke down in the tenderloin so it had to be towed..so he came and stayed at my house (i was gonna go to his in daly city..but without the car....)
anyways...the next day and 80 dollars in checkup fees later..the car started fine. They couldnt figure out what was wrong...
Anyways....so today we finally got together since tomorrow is his day off. He came to my house to pick me up to take me to his place...I had been cleaning all day. He wanted to go out to eat, and the only place open was sparkys. Im broke right now so I cant afford to eat out but he wanted to treat me which was very nice. Then all hell broke loose. He asked me to order what I wanted (got a veggie burger since its all they had I could eat)
He had told me he was gonna get a regular burger...and I made some *eww gross* comment....and he said...only kidding Ill get a veggie...
Well he didnt. He ordered a regular one. I told him that I wouldnt kiss him if he ate it..or at the very least hed hafta brush his teeth and rinse with moulthwash before Id come close.....I told him it was a really big turn off.....then I dropped the bomb on him about my veggie beleifs...that I think eating animals is murder. He kept saying he was hungry and wanted the burger....assuming that a veggie burger wouldnt be filling enough for him (which irritated me) Anyways...he ended up ordering a salad instead, while angry because I made a big deal. I realize it wasnt the place or time for it, and Im sure he and everyone reading this probably will think Im an asshole for what I did...but the truth had to come out sooner or later. I can never date a non vegetarian. I have plenty of non veggie friends...but friends and lovers are different. You can love friends from a physical and emotional distance....doesnt work that way (in most cases) for lovers....
Also..he smokes...and Im allergic and vehemently against smoking.....when I walk down the street and get a whiff, I get a headache, nausea, throat closes up and gets sore, etc.....so thats not a match.
He doesnt drink alot...but when he does drink He likes to get nice and toasty...another big turnoff for me. I also dont think its safe to drink 3 glasses of wine and then drive (within a 2 hour period...) I know it may sound extreme, but I like being in the car with completely sober ppl...not buzzed, or stoned etc...
So...anyways....i ate half the veggie burger..of course feeling guilty the whole time...couldnt eat the rest. He picked at his salad....
Then he brought me home, and he left.
Really shitty evening! It was my fault too....
I do beleive what I do, and I do think its important to express that, however it was really shitty timing, and not appropriate at all in the situation.
Sigh.
Oh..and a couple weeks before this a guy I really liked who came over for new years tore a ligament while we were wrestling..and even tho its nobody's fault hes chosen to passive aggressively blame it on me, and not talk to me. So...thats 2 potential love-interests in 2 weeks that has gone sour in one way or another based on actions I initiated. (well..not totally..the guy started wrestling me first) Anyways...shitty shitty shitty!
Where are all the nice queer vegetarian spiritual guys? (who arent old enough to be my father...???)
IF youre out there.....if only......
Well..theres this guy I had met a couple weeks ago at a (lets just say adult venue) We got along really well....the chemistry was there......
We had alot of fun.....
We met again the next week and he took me to a big work party that was thrown (he works at hotel Nikko) it was fancy.....kinda boring tho but ok. That nite his car broke down in the tenderloin so it had to be towed..so he came and stayed at my house (i was gonna go to his in daly city..but without the car....)
anyways...the next day and 80 dollars in checkup fees later..the car started fine. They couldnt figure out what was wrong...
Anyways....so today we finally got together since tomorrow is his day off. He came to my house to pick me up to take me to his place...I had been cleaning all day. He wanted to go out to eat, and the only place open was sparkys. Im broke right now so I cant afford to eat out but he wanted to treat me which was very nice. Then all hell broke loose. He asked me to order what I wanted (got a veggie burger since its all they had I could eat)
He had told me he was gonna get a regular burger...and I made some *eww gross* comment....and he said...only kidding Ill get a veggie...
Well he didnt. He ordered a regular one. I told him that I wouldnt kiss him if he ate it..or at the very least hed hafta brush his teeth and rinse with moulthwash before Id come close.....I told him it was a really big turn off.....then I dropped the bomb on him about my veggie beleifs...that I think eating animals is murder. He kept saying he was hungry and wanted the burger....assuming that a veggie burger wouldnt be filling enough for him (which irritated me) Anyways...he ended up ordering a salad instead, while angry because I made a big deal. I realize it wasnt the place or time for it, and Im sure he and everyone reading this probably will think Im an asshole for what I did...but the truth had to come out sooner or later. I can never date a non vegetarian. I have plenty of non veggie friends...but friends and lovers are different. You can love friends from a physical and emotional distance....doesnt work that way (in most cases) for lovers....
Also..he smokes...and Im allergic and vehemently against smoking.....when I walk down the street and get a whiff, I get a headache, nausea, throat closes up and gets sore, etc.....so thats not a match.
He doesnt drink alot...but when he does drink He likes to get nice and toasty...another big turnoff for me. I also dont think its safe to drink 3 glasses of wine and then drive (within a 2 hour period...) I know it may sound extreme, but I like being in the car with completely sober ppl...not buzzed, or stoned etc...
So...anyways....i ate half the veggie burger..of course feeling guilty the whole time...couldnt eat the rest. He picked at his salad....
Then he brought me home, and he left.
Really shitty evening! It was my fault too....
I do beleive what I do, and I do think its important to express that, however it was really shitty timing, and not appropriate at all in the situation.
Sigh.
Oh..and a couple weeks before this a guy I really liked who came over for new years tore a ligament while we were wrestling..and even tho its nobody's fault hes chosen to passive aggressively blame it on me, and not talk to me. So...thats 2 potential love-interests in 2 weeks that has gone sour in one way or another based on actions I initiated. (well..not totally..the guy started wrestling me first) Anyways...shitty shitty shitty!
Where are all the nice queer vegetarian spiritual guys? (who arent old enough to be my father...???)
IF youre out there.....if only......
posted by:
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SF Bay Area
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Re: I f*cked up good..... NO YOU DIDN"T!
Wed, March 28, 2007 - 1:00 PMYou didn't fuck up. All you did is convey your feelings on a topic that was important to you. For all you know you have planted a "seed" in that non vegan's head about what he is doing with his diet and how he is affecting the world. And just because 2 "love" interests don't pan out it doesn't mean you've done anything wrong, they certainly sounded like duds to me. If a man is going to flip out because of how you feel about meat (and he smokes cigs (ew))he doesn't sound like hes the man for you. Sometimes the universe puts us in the path of others for some reason that is beyond us. But I do believe that you may have had some kind of a positive impact on the non vegan Daly City guy, he's probably thinking about his life choises right now :~)
Warm thoughts,
Christopher
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Re: I f*cked up good.....
Fri, March 30, 2007 - 9:48 AMI think there is a group called Meet Up and there are different chapters for different topics, like being vegan. vegan.meetup.com/
It might help, also try hanging out at your local veggie stores to meet people.
Good Luck in finding a veggie boyfriend.
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Unsu...
Re: I f*cked up good.....
Thu, March 20, 2008 - 9:16 AMVery late so youre probably not interested, but I dont think it was all your fault.
Theres no way Id go near someone who ate animals. Like you say, friends, family, thats one thing, its tolerable, but lovers...heh you were just being honest. It was bound to have come up sooner or later. Better sooner than later a mon avis.
Better you stuck by your principles and were true to yourself, than sit there feeling angry and being passive. If I were you, I wouldnt have done anything differently.
Take Care
Adam x
